Hammer Control

May 22nd, 2006 by Joe

Hammer
According to a KSL News Report a Massachusetts man is in police custody accused of beating his son and wife to death with a hammer.

It’s examples like this that make me weep! Why would a man in such an emotional state have access to a hammer?

Studies have shown that homes with a hammer present are MUCH more likely to have “hammer related injuries” (including deaths) than homes without hammers!

How many children must be injured or killed before we call for tighter hammer control? I suggest we impose MANDATORY background checks and a 3-day “cooling off” period before anyone can purchase a hammer.

From what I understand, this was a relatively heavy

hammer, what should be dubbed an “assault hammer.” Why would anyone need anything more than a rubber mallet? Only construction professionals should be allowed to purchase and use assault hammers, and even then they should be registered and kept locked in a padded case whenever not in use.

Additionally, a national “hammer impact database” should be kept of the unique “impact finger-print” that each hammer makes so that we can track each hammer to its owner.

Only through tighter hammer control measures such as these can we prevent greusome events like this one!!

Posted in Satire, humor, politics

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About Greener Living thru Technology

JoeLevi.com is the personal web log of Joe Levi -- an ASP.NET Web Developer by trade and by hobby. Joe's love of technology isn't just limited to the web, he's also interested in green and environmentally friendly technology and technological solutions. If it has to do with technology, improving the quality of life, geek humor, tech politics, self-defense, environmental stewardship, or anything related, you'll probably find it at www.JoeLevi.com.

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