I think one of the biggest problems with having a child with Asperger Syndrome is that people relate it so closely with Autism. But in fact it is not Autism. It is no closer to Autism than Rett’s Syndrome is an autistic disorder. In fact the only thing that even can put them in the same category is that they are a category of neurologically-based disorders that have a range of delays in different developmental stages.
The reason for this confusion in today’s society stems back to the 1940’s when a Viennese pediatrician Hans Asperger who observed autistic-like behaviors and difficulties with social and communication skills in boys who had normal intelligence and language development. Many professionals felt Asperger’s Disorder was simply a milder form of autism and used the term “high-functioning autism” to describe these individuals.
However, as time and studies progressed, Professor Uta Frith, with the Institute of Cognitive Neuroscience of University College London and author of Autism and Asperger Syndrome, describes individuals with Asperger’s Disorder as “having a dash of Autism.” They are separate disorders, but may portray similar characteristics at times. In fact by 1994, Asperger’s Disorder was added to the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) as a separate disorder from autism.
Children with Asperger’s Disorder may be only mildly affected and frequently have good language and cognitive skills. To the untrained observer, a child with Asperger’s Disorder may just seem different.
Children with autism are frequently seen as aloof and uninterested in others. This is not the case with Asperger’s Disorder. Individuals with Asperger’s Disorder usually want to fit in and have interaction with others; they simply don’t know how to do it. They may be socially awkward, not understanding conventional social rules, or may show a lack of empathy. They may have limited eye contact, seem to be unengaged in a conversation, and not understand the use of gestures.
Interests in a particular subject may border on the obsessive. Children with Asperger’s Disorder frequently like to collect categories of things, such as rocks or bottle caps. They may be proficient in knowing categories of information, such as baseball statistics or Latin names of flowers. While they may have good rote memory skills, they have difficulty with abstract concepts.
One of the major differences between Asperger’s Disorder and autism is that, by definition, there is no speech delay in Asperger’s. In fact, children with Asperger’s Disorder frequently have good language skills; they simply use language in different ways. Speech patterns may be unusual, lacking inflection or having a rhythmic nature. Speech may be formal and too loud or high pitched. Children with Asperger’s Disorder may not understand the subtleties of language, such as irony and humor, or may not understand the give and take nature of a conversation.
Another distinction between Asperger’s Disorder and autism concerns cognitive ability. While some individuals with Autism experience mental retardation, by definition a person with Asperger’s Disorder cannot possess a “clinically significant” cognitive delay. This does not imply that all individuals with autism have mental retardation. Some do and some do not, but a person with Asperger’s Disorder possesses average to above average intelligence.
As mother of a seven year old son with Asperger Syndrome, I see things that simply aren’t explain in the all the wonderful text books, and articles that I found as I have researched and learned about AS. What they don’t tell you is these children are very normal. Michael is very much a normal seven year old. He can have very normal social behaviors. He loves to hang out with friends, he has girlfriends (yikes!), he likes his hair gelled, and makes friends very easily. He can be very accepting. Did I mention that he can test his parents and push their buttons on a whim?
The Key to Sucess is to get involved in highly structured social groups that give you the oppertunity to teach a common ground.
However, interlaced between all of his wonderfulness, is anxiety and misunderstandings. The best thing we ever did for Michael was get him social skills classes by age three. For us, The Children’s Center in Salt Lake City, and Primary Children’s services were priceless. What he needed was repetitive and consistent training of how to act in a social environment. And that is what they provided. Its things like “this is a line. We all stand in line to go to the water fountain. The line can move…” It was explaining the basics that we were misunderstanding. “Don’t throw the ball at someone until they are looking at you and their hands are up.” (That was a good one.) We also have had a lot of practice and work on, “see my face, this is a mad face. When I make this face you need to stop what you are doing, put your hands down, and come to me quietly.” “See this face, I am happy, I like what you are doing. This is good.” And stuff like that. Once we got recognition and social rules down, we had a common bases to continue to teach him from. That helped a lot.
But, as life throws it things change, all the time. AS kids don’t like change in their lives, as a general rule. Neither does 90% of the population. But for Michael change can really mess him up. This is exactly the situation that we are going through now. Last year, he had the same “Special Ed teacher” as he had from Kindergarten, and was mainstreamed to regular Ed. But even then, he still went to her class for 30 minutes a day.
This year, he doesn’t see her at all or his friends from that class, because he is in a new regular Ed class. He has a new teacher, new friends, new room, new schedule, and new homework. Yeah…. he is one mad kid. So, we are adding in time with his Special Ed class for 30 minutes a day, to help him calm down and transition into his new schedule. Hopefully next year, we will remember this lesson and not repeat it! Not fun. But in a few weeks, Michael will be adjusted, and happy and stable in his classroom.
Recognize their amazing spirit!
Humor
Michael does have a sense of humor. He can make the whole room laugh. He is so incredibly funny. Granted he is not funny because he can tell a joke- heaven’s no! – But he is funny because his knows the way things are suppose to be, and laughs at how things turn out! He is so fun to have around. He has his own personality.
Perfection
He takes pride in his work. He is very much a perfectionist. His hand writing and his papers have to be just so, or he erases them, and corrects them.
Special Abilities
I have not even mentioned Michael’s athletic abilities. He was two weeks old, and would stand up on my lap. He would have to lay his head on my shoulder because it was so heavy. By four months old, he was holding on to my fingers walking around the room. I got it on tape, just to prove it! It was incredible. By two, he could hit anything he wanted to at any distance, with any size ball he wanted.
(Flash Back)When Michael was two we were trying to help him with his anxiety and aggression, (Yes, those also come with AS) and we were sent to a social worker, who, like way too many in the psychiatry field, knew nothing about AS. He assumed that since Michael didn’t show up on the school’s autism test, he was normal. Sucker! So we brought Michael to him. (This is my favorite part.) As Michael walked into the new environment he began getting into everything. Pretty normal right, until he found a bucket of golf balls. He began throwing them at the social worker, nailing the guy in the forehead every time. Michael was playing catch with him, and he even warned him that he was playing catch with him. He told him “DUE!” This was Michael’s two year old word for “Catch”!
Even now, as gifted as he is, he doesn’t like sports. He stresses out over the strategy of the game. Relying on what others are going to do, so that he knows what to do is very stressful. We have found much more success in individual sports like swimming. He is an awesome swimmer. I have been tempted to try karate, but I am afraid he will use it on his siblings.
Anyhow, all and all Asperger Syndrome is nothing to be scared of… it just means this is as person that is really neat, you just need to get to know them. And if you are lucky enough to have AS in your family, and are one of the prized people that God is teaching humility to… take a deep breath. It’s a lot of fun, and a lot of work. And it is definitely worth it.
